In the February 2013 “Previews” catalogue, which solicits new comic book releases for April, DC Comics revealed their “WTF Certified” marketing ploy, expected to traverse the entire New 52 line-up. The initiative boasts a WTF (“What the F**k!”) moment in every issue published that month, stating each one is “going to leave readers in a state of shock.”

While flipping through the catalogue, I’ve taken my best guesses as to what these “WTF Certified” revelations may be for a bunch of titles (as initially tweeted on my little blue bird feed), listing the first thing that came to mind upon seeing the cover or reading the solicit text. Some are good, most are bad, but they’ll all leave you saying “What the f**k!?” So grab your copy of today’s newly pressed “Previews” catalogue and follow along on pages 81-129 or by clicking here!

WARNING: Swearing ahead!

wtfJL

“Justice League” #19

-The “WTF Certified” thing DC is touting for April sounds pretty lame. Each issue they put out that month contains a #WTF moment? OoOok…

-Green Arrow #19 #WTFCertified moment: it’s not cancelled by #20 and Jeff Lemire is staying on at least through to #21. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!

-Justice League of America’s Vibe #3 #WTFCertified moment: it’s announced at the end his series won’t be cancelled at #8, but #10. WHAT THE FUCK!?!???!?

-Justice League #19 #WTFCertified moment: Superman beats Aquaman at the backstroke. WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!? Who saw that one coming!

"Aquaman" #19

“Aquaman” #19

-Aquaman #19 #WTFCertified moment: The Ice King’s responsible for blue flavored freezie pops tasting so delicious. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!

-Savage Hawkman #19 #WTFCertified moment: The announcement Rob Liefeld’s back on writing AND art duties with #20. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?

-DC Universe Presents #19 #WTFCertified moment: With a giant fucking sword run straight through Flash on the cover, this series actually sells a copy off the shelf. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?

"DC Universe Presents" #19

“DC Universe Presents” #19

-The Fury of Firestorm: The Nuclear Man #19 #WTFCertifiedmoment: THIS SERIES IS STILL BEING PUBLISHED!? WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!

-Worlds’ Finest #11 #WTFCertified moment: Power Girl goes black and doesn’t go back. WHAT THE F — wait, that makes sense.

-Action Comics #19 #WTFCertified moment: The guy who wrote Marvel’s “Shadowland” is now writing a flagship DC title? WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?

-Superman #19 #WTFCertified moment: Superman goes an entire issue WITHOUT WEARING A CAPE. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?

wtfWF

“Worlds’ Finest” #11

-Talon #7 #WTFCertified moment: Calvin Rose gets the shit kicked out of him on the cover of his own book yet again. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?

-Batman the Dark Knight #19 #WTFCertified moment: People still buy this book despite clearly being the worst of the Bat lot. WHAT THE FUCK!?

-Detective Comics #19 #WTFCertified moment: John Layman quits Image comics and “Chew” to write this series forever. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!!

-Catwoman #19 #WTFCertified moment: Nope, with a cover like that, this one’s too damn easy.

wtfSUPERMAN

“Superman” #19

-Birds of Prey #19 #WTFCertified moment: Batgirl and company present an all mime issue! WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?

-Batwing #19 #WTFCertified moment: Batwing dies at the end. WHAT THE F — oh, wait. He’s not caucasian. We all saw that one coming.

-Nightwing #19 #WTFCertified moment: It’s revealed the blue costume never existed. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!!????!!!? MY CHILDHOOD IS RUINED!

-Red Hood and the Outlaws 19 #WTFCertified moment: Starfire’s new costume, a full-body jumpsuit, fuses to her body — PERMANENTLY. WHAT THE FUCK!?!

"Talon" #7

“Talon” #7

-Green Lantern #19 #WTFCertified moment: Introducing the Poop Brown Lantern Corps! WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?

-Green Lantern Corps #19 #WTFCertified moment: Somebody actually cares about Guy Gardner for 5 seconds. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?

-Green Lantern New Guardians #19 #WTFCertified moment: With that ridiculous faceplate, it’s revealed Kyle is truly RoboCop. WHAT THE FUCK?!?!

-Red Lanterns #19 #WTFCertified moment: That stupid cat kills every Lantern that isn’t Green, Red or Blue. WHAT THE F — I mean, THANK YOU!!!

"Catwoman" #19

“Catwoman” #19

-Phantom Stranger #7 #WTFCertified moment: The title character finally speaks a sentence that isn’t cryptic bullshit. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!

-Sword of Sorcery #7 #WTFCertified moment: Nobody’s reading this, are they? WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!???

-Animal Man #19 #WTFCertified moment: The Rot does not appear, nor is mentioned in any way, shape or form during this issue. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?

-Swamp Thing #19 #WTFCertified moment: “Charles Soule” is revealed to be a nom de plume of Scott Snyder. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!!?!?

"Birds of Prey" #19

“Birds of Prey” #19

-Dial H #11 #WTFCertified moment: People who have read all 11 issues still have no idea what’s going on. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

-Demon Knights #19 #WTFCertified moment: X-O Manowar shows up, blasting the shit out of everyone. WHAT THE F — no. AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-I Vampire #19 #WTFCertified moment: This is the final issue while “Firestorm” & “Suicide Squad” continue publication. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!

"Batman" #19

“Batman” #19

-Threshold #4: This issue actually doesn’t get a #WTFCertified moment considering nobody read #1-3.

-Suicide Squad #19 #WTFCertified moment: Everyone finally commits suicide, ending the series. WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

-Legion of Super-Heroes #19 #WTFCertified moment: Legion goes back to the 80s to prevent the creation of any more crappy “Legion” comics after that time. WHAT THE FUCK!

-Teen Titans #19 #WTFCertified moment: In a single “Flashpoint-esque” stroke, it’s as if this series never existed. THANK FUCKING GOD!!!!!!!!

-The Ravagers #11 #WTFCertified moment: See the WTF Certified moment for “Teen Titans” #19.

-And that’s that. Is your mind blown by all these insane #WTFCertifiedmoments? MINE SURE IS! I need a mint.

-Truth be told though, #WTFCertified can be cool. The “Batman” #19 cover makes you guess and the belief in Lemire’s “Green Arrow” feels legit.

-Juan Jose Ryp is an artist who slips under the radar — I’ll buy “Katana” #3 for the cover alone. The blade… #WTFCertified?

-I want “Katana” to be successful. She’s an exciting, energetic character who’s unpredictably precise — Ann Nocenti has a great opportunity to succeed where the latest “Huntress” miniseries failed.

Which #WTFCertified issues will  you be reading?